Some of my friends (Saurabh, Gurpreet, ..) have been asking me to write a blog post since I ve landed in this new country. I never felt like writing anything from the day I stepped on the land I never wanted to come to. But then, its just for studies, as I have always said and it seems I will live with this pillar of strength for the time to come. Anyways, sitting in the living room and having breakfast cooked by myself at noon with Jaspreet bhaji (whos always lost in the songs of Nusrat and Shiv kumar batalvi or is playing with assignments and books) is an experience that makes me feel away from home. As a punishment for getting up late, I had to cook my breakfast at home and burnt the bread in the toaster/tawa and then mom showing sympathy that followed the punishment ( a human virtue) gave me yummy paranthas and coffee. So, looking out of the window, I see the blue cloudy sky- clouds moving slowly in a direction nobody knows, taking my hand out of the window I feel a breeze, I see the rain water dripping down my face at times when its raining, far away from the buildings the greenery in abundance and farther the horizon and farther.....What farther? Oh, farther must be my home, home sweet home and Delhi, and my folks, friends, and everyone else who matters. Now comes the feeling. I see the sky and everyone else in Delhi must also be seeing it, so I reach their eyes and talk to them. The breeze touches me, it will touch them too, so I hug them. The rain water, they must be also getting dripped in, and hence we feel the same at some times and share. The greenery in the far must be soothing to their eyes too, and lastly far from the horizon, they can reach me too. Hence, I am always at home.
This brings me a better perspective of life. God never made countries, he made land, earth. He still has everything common for every being on earth. The flora, the fauna, the land, the sky and the air, the essential nature for us is still with me. Only material world has changed. The buildings have changed, cooked food (raw food by nature is still the same) has changed, the technology affecting and enhancing human lives has changed and least importantly, the dialect and language has changed. But, if I see the broader picture, nothing has changed. Everything that should matter the most is still the same, Thee still appears to me in the blue sky that I see out of the window, I can still feel the same thinking of Him and I still chant his name as I did with my folks back home.
The essence of all this is, I am still human, and I can't remember the Truth always that I should to remain happy in His will, always.
As Nusrat sings beautifully relevant to the same feeling-
Aag ko khel patangon ne samajh rakha hai, sabko anjaam ka dar ho yeh zaroori to nahin.
Sheikh karta to hai masjid mein khuda ko sajde, uske sajdo mein asar ho yeh zaroori to nahin.
So, I try to be like a patanga playing in this world of fire and worrying about the consequences, forgetting the presence of Thee. The belief that shows that I have faith in Thee, is like the sajda that Sheikh offers to khuda, but then, the sajda that I should offer from heart following His will with happiness is missing.
I am still learning how I should discover His will more, to understand the happenings and simply live in the "razaa".
-G Singh 16th September, 2006.